winter wasteland

My people are from the lands where the north wind blows and yetis still walk the earth. in the cold, dark night I stand and smoke in front of mobil on the run. multidirectional winds whip my hair and ice crystals form along my brow. what's this? a human form appears between the drifts of snow, but this is no human who approaches. atop his gigantic forehead I see a bicycle helmet, but what of the bicycle to match? it is nowhere to be seen. icicles hang from his sgraggly beard and he waves to me with a toothless grin. this could only be the yeti, Ron. defiler of all things clean and antibacterial. a sharp gasp escapes my lips as I snuff out my cigarette and rush indoors, but no mere panes of glass will hold this monster at bay. a blast of cold air chills my very bones as the door swings open and in walks the yeti.

(now adding text from memory not included in original writing in anecdotal, less poetic form)

cheerful as ever, yet sounding clearly under the weather, Ron says hello and explains that he is sick. he absconds to the aisles of the store and is momentarily forgotten. returning with niquil and coffee, he requests cigarettes and voices hopes of feeling better. I agree thet he is very sick and wish him well. he walks outside and lights up a smoke. again forgotten as some police officers enter and get free coffee. after an indefinite portion of time, the police ask what happened to Ron, as they have lost track of him as well. I tell them that he slipped from my mind as he left my immediate field of vision. police leave and Ron appears walking from the bathroom.
"I'm sorry, Andy. I tried to get it in the toilet as much as I could and tried to clean it up." Ron voices apologies for an unknown act.
"that's alright." I say, unsure of what evil was unleashed in the men's room.
later that night, at bathroom cleaning time, I enter the men's room to find shit everywhere! on the toilet, the wall (don't ask me how) and on the floor. Ron had unleashed the sheast.