bored? want to get eft? no contacts?

if you're a nothing master who likes to sit on the couch all the time, here's a fun activity:

NUTMEG
step 1- get the following items (probably just sitting there useless like you)
coffee maker
coffee
ground nutmeg
step 2- prepare to make coffee as normal, but don't turn it on yet! first, add a shitload of nutmeg. doesn't matter how much, cover the top of the coffee grounds, don't want to see any black through the brown.
step 3- resume the usual coffee procedure and make sure to drink the whole pot. probably a good morning idea as at night, you might just sleep through the uber-stone or throw off your schedule (as if you had one) with all the caffeine.
step 4- don't have anything to do all day or night (shouldn't be too tough for you!) the next day you'll be back to whatever you call normal.

MORNING GLORY
this is for nothing masters on the move! make sure it's weather you can walk in as you will walk. this is another morning idea.
step 1- get morning glory seeds: heavenly blue, flying saucers, pearly gates. we're aiming for 300 seeds per psychonaut. tell the casheer about a window box project at an apartment complex (don't say which one).
step 2- grind the seeds any way you can. if you are preparing them for yourself, chew them. it's easy!
step 3- soak the seeds in water for an hour, then filter out the solids and toss them.
step 4- dry the liquid by evaporation, but not by heat. this might take a long time, but what are you going to do? time's the only thing you've got!
step 5- dissolve the grime (doesn't have to be completely dry) in liquor (based on preference for type and amount) and drink it. don't use so much booze that you glue yourself down, because you want to be out walking and not tanked from vodka in like 2-3 hours.

these are not professional in any way and I do not reccomend these practices in any way. that said, you can take this otc fun to new extremes with this next stupidly dangerous and potentially fatal procedure:

EVERYTHING!
step 1- get all of these items together. if you have to buy things, get it all from the same store (trust me on this)
2 bottles robitussin maximum strength cough pills dextromethorphan hydrobromide
1 pack generic allergy medicine diphenhydramine hydrochloride
nutmeg coffee (see above)
morning glory drink (see above)
1 bottle nodoz (make sure they are white pills)
1 bottle delsym dextromethorphan polistyex
booze and pot are optional based on availability, age, and preferance

step 2- soak the robitussin pills in hot water for 45 minutes in a glass. chop with scissors to cut all pills and strain, removing solids. make sure to squeeze the gelatinous mess and use a metal mesh strainer not a coffee filter.
step 3- combine the following in a very large container: delsym, robitussin pill innards, nutmeg coffee, morning glory mixed drink, crush 1 nodoz and add it.
step 4- use the "liquid satan" to wash down the allergy meds.
step 5- crush and sniff 1 nodoz
step 6- administer reefer if available and hold on to your insides while they feel like they might become outsides.
step 7- when the nausea clears, you'll be completely eft. congrats on your wild new state of mind.

this is not a suicide procedure, as you'll probably live. this is not advice of any kind. I have performed parts of "everything" to horrifying results, but never have i ever tried the whole thing. if you are young, brave, foolish, and lucky feel free to face the unknown results.